i'm inspired

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thank you oprah, for making this story more well known. & thank you matt for allowing us into your world, you are doing an amazing job!

created for brett, by chayna, with love of course

ok, so i asked brett what topic to dive into today... octomom? because she hasn't had enough publicity... michael phelps? because he's such a little devil for smoking the pot... where michael jordan's son is going to school? because who really cares... how crappy michigan state did against unc? because that's just sad...

so he suggested i work out my frustrations with him via my blog. great idea! especially on our FOUR YEAR ANNIVERSARY! 

recently, on my days off i have tried to get up a decent time so that i could (a) see more sunshine (b) spend more time with my loving boyfriend (c) be more productive. yesterday i woke up early and had planned to take brett to a local park that we'd never been to. i wanted to be all romantical and hold hands, take in the nature, sit on a park bench and talk about our future. not about our careers, not about money, not about anything really specific. just non-forced blabbering about how much we love each other and why we want to spend forever, together. awh, cute, right? wrong! 

brett woke up in a crappy mood at 3PM. i had asked him at about 1PM to wake up sometime soon, and filled him in briefly on my plan. he didn't say no, he just said he wanted a couple more hours. ok fine. so at 4ish we head over to this beautiful park. the sun was starting to set, there were people everywhere, the breeze was perfect but brett's mood was far from.

i tried holding his hand on the way over to the walking path, he resisted. he brought up money and how he needs to make some soon. i suggested he set up a show near the end of april when he already has a show in santa maria. he says he doesn't really want to do that paying show. i asked him if he called to cancel. he said, it's a 5 minute thing. i'm not calling them. so i say, brett it's common courtesy to call them and let them know you're not planning on doing it. they'll need to find a replacement. he BLOWS UP. he already knew that and why am i talking to him like a mom?! 

excuse me? you just said you weren't going to call them. and then he continues to tell me how stupid i am and how i need to talk to him the right way. i'm embarrassed because we're in public, oh and i don't deserve that bullshit. so i tell him to shut up and walk either in front of, or behind me or just go to the car. i'm going to try to enjoy some of this park and i will talk to him when we get to the car. i knew this was a bad idea, because brett always looses his shiznit when i walk away from him, but i did it anyway because i was pissed off. 

we probably spent 20 minutes at this park. the entire trip was horrible. we screamed at each other the whole way home. i dropped him off and left. we eventually resolved our spat and were able to have a semi-romantic night. 

so the point of this is, are other men like this? i mean how do you wake up cussing? i just don't understand it. he lets his dreams effect his real life. he lets women who mean nothing to him on oprah piss him off when catches a tiny segment. he thinks all people are worthless, disgusting, skin sacks of shit. but it's not like this everyday. no some days he really likes people. some days he's in a great mood. sometimes he's romantic without even trying. sometimes he's willing to help me around the house. there are days when he doesn't want to leave the house. there are days when he cant wait to leave the house. there are days when he wants to hang out in the outdoors being active. there are days (like yesterday) when the last thing he wants to do is be in the sun or be active. 

is he bipolar doctor? 

he has a million qualities i love about him. yesterday we finally did talk about the actual reason we are together. we love each other, plain & simple. we're not together because we have to be, we're together because we want to be. he is one of the most intelligent people i've met. he can make me laugh when i'm happy, sad or mad. i can turn to him whenever i need to be lifted up. he actually does have a sensitive side, he doesn't like to show it, but i know it exists because i get to see it. i think he'll be an incredible father. his patience grows & grows. 

i know i'm not perfect and we frustrate the hell out of each other, but at the

end of the day, it's his hand i want to hold. it's his stinky breath i want to wake up to. everyday. forever & ever.

The End of Cancun

The rest of the trip was pretty relaxing, the way I pictured it! Sunday we really did nothing! We slept in finally and then just hung out and took advantage of the all-inclusive. I made dinner reservations at the Mexican restaurant, which was actually pretty good. It's sad that I don't really remember what we did. 

Monday morning I woke up early to pack our luggage, when I looked out the window I noticed something strange & beautiful. NO WIND! I was so excited, I showered and packed even faster. I told Brett, it's not windy! People are out on the ocean!!! He rolled over and went back to sleep. As I was showering I was pretty disappointed, but I knew he was hurting from the sunburn and we probably overdid it with the walking and him being status-post injury. And just then, he popped his head in and said, "What do you want to do?" So we went down to the beach and got a kayak and away we went. I really wanted to parasail but we just didn't have time, and Brett really wanted to do the waverunners but they were all rented. So we settled for kayaking, but it was beautiful and perfect and everything I wished the whole vacation had been! And it was over, in a New York minute!

Saturday at Xcaret!

Saturday morning we were up bright & early in order to catch our bus to Xcaret at 7:15 am. Hands down this day made our vacation! I would highly recommend visiting Xcaret next time you are in Mexico! It's an eco park and it really just is an amazing blend of nature, history, beauty & fun!Once we got to the park, Brett & I immediately headed to the underground river to do some snorkeling. It was so much fun! There were so many beautiful fish, I'd post pictures but we're not very good underwater  photographers! After the river, I think we walked about 100 miles around the park for the rest of the day. We were trying to avoid the shows during the day because we had tickets for the Espectacular show that evening.

 We did watch one show with these 

men that 'flew' from 30 meters above ground, they are sun worshippers. One of the men had to be close to 80, it was crazy!

We were able to snorkel in this little inlet, but not out in the ocean as it was... that's right, too windy to do anything! I really wanted to go Sea Trekking or Snuba but I shouldn't complain because the day was incredible! 

There were old Mayan Ruins amongst the park. It was similar to a 

zoo I guess to because there were a ton of animals. You could swim with the dolphins or sharks. I was in love with the sea turtles! I took about a millions pictures and videos!

I feel like I'm not doing Xcaret justice with my descriptions. It's just an amazing place that I think everyone should experience. 

We didn't get home until midnight! It was a long, exhausting day but so worth it!

Day 2 in Cancun

Day Two we spent a lot of time relaxing. Brett realized, "Hey I'm 30." So the Spring Break '09 quickly became a much needed R&R. I woke up at 6:30am and went down to the pool to reserve a couple of lounge chairs, then sat out on our balcony drinking coffee, reading my magazine and taking in the amazing views while Brett slept in until 8:30. We did the breakfast thing and then decided, despite Brett's horrible sunburn, to hang out at the pool, slathered in sunblock! I really wanted to utilize the swim up bar, but the pool water was freezing! It was so windy everyday, they had the red flags out and we couldn't really do any water activities... After a lot of coaxing, Brett got me into the pool to the bar. I intended to stay in the sun for only an hour, but we met a fun couple from Pennsylvania, Heidi & Eric. We ended up in the pool until 3pm, had a late lunch with them and then decided it was time for a siesta! 

KU played Michigan State that night and we were pissed because CBS doesn't exist in Mexico, but luckily ESPN2 covered it. I don't know why I said 'luckily,' I fell asleep and woke up to KU losing! Sadness... I could have just stayed in bed all night, but we had told our new friends that we'd meet them at Senor Frogs. So away we went..... 

Let me just say that when we have children, especially if they are girls, they WILL NOT be going to Cancun when they are 18! There were wet t-shirt contests, booty contests, drinking contests.... Aw Lawdy! And none of the contests have a winner so they make all of the contestants climb up a ladder and then push them down a water slide that winds through the bar and finally shoots you out into the ocean! WHAT?! 

On the way back to the hotel at 3am, we were starving and made the wrong decision to stop at Carl's Jr. There is a different kind of grease in Mexico, that's all I'm going to say! As we were walking to the bus stop, we saw about 400 Mexicans selling pizza off the back of their mopeds! Hilarious! We passed the bus stop and went to our 'sister hotel' to check out their amenities and eventually got back to our hotel room. Just in time to climb into bed to wake up at 6:30am to head to Xcaret! 

we're baaaaaaaaaaack from Cancun!

Brett & I returned home from Cancun late Monday night. We had an absolute blast!!! I'm going to blog about the entire trip with pictures, but I haven't yet uploaded my photos yet... so here's part of the story...As most of you know, I decided to surprise Brett with a trip to Cancun for his 30th birthday. The poor boy had never been out of the country. Around Valentine's Day, I purchased the trip and then I had to try to keep it a secret for the next month.  Well, Mr. Birthday Boy comes home from work he says, "You could not pay me to go to Mexico right now!" I take a deep breath, "Why honey?" Drug cartels, danger, etc.... So I do some research and find that Cancun is the safest place in Mexico for tourists. A couple days pass and he says, "Seriously, you aren't planning a trip to Mexico for my bday right?" My response, "No, we can't afford that." ...shit... So anyway, after a few days of acting like a weirdo around

 the house I broke down and told him, he agreed to go and so the vacation begins on March 25th. 

I'm really glad we made our flight from LAX at 10:45am because I had also planned a surprise party for him the night before at Tokyo Delves. We had far too many sake bombs and my cell phone/alarm clock had never been set... oh and I left it in the car overnight so I would have never heard it anyway! But my brain woke me up at 6am and away we went...

Even in the AMERICAN airport, Brett had a sense of fear. It was pretty funny! So we fly into Cancun around 4:30pm Wednesday night. Our Hotel had transportation waiting for us. We get to the Riu Caribe and check in. The Hotel is full so they put us in the basement, with a view of a hill going up to the ocean. Um no. They told us they would move us the next morning after people checked out. Thank God! 

Brett gets great idea, "Spring Break '09 Bitches! Let's drink our faces off!" He proceeded to have a drinking contest with himself, let's just say he won. He told me he was going to 'stick to beer,' famous last words. They had a liquor dispenser in our room and we thought, 'It's gotta be watered down, right?' So Brett made himself a few drinks with 3/4 glass alcohol and a splash of nasty Mexican soda. Ew. 

We were strolling through the hotel when we found a 30+ party. Brett was mad because he was still 29 for two more days. But we crashed the party anyway, it was so lame. They were playing George Michael with a video projection screen. LAME! 

We headed to the sports bar and befriended George & Carla, a couple from Texas. After a few shots of nastiness, Brett was tanked! So he stumbled back to the room and passed out. I had already warned him that the next morning we had to wake up early (8:30am) to meet with the guy to plan our week, and we had to check out of our room by 10am so we could get into a better room. 

At that 8:30 meeting, Brett was a half a human. I made the decisions of what trips we would take. I tried to force him to eat breakfast, I think he choked down 4 pieces of potato before he excused himself to the restroom. As he was throwing up, his sunglasses fell into the toilet... he grabbed them and decided to wash them off. While he's cleaning the glasses they break, I think we all know that was God's way of telling Brett not to put those nasty glasses back on his face!

I headed down to the beach, Brett stumbled behind me like a lost, drunken puppy. I smeared sunblock all over his face and ears because I'm a good girlfriend but left if up to him to get the rest of his body. Well, he didn't, so after a few hours of sleeping in the sun I woke up my lobster. I told him to drink some water, handed him a half liter of water. He chugged 75% of it and immediately threw up, on the beach, next to the sand volleyball court. He puked three times on the way to the bathroom. I was worried, but I had to laugh because there were high school/college kids on spring break yelling "Yeah Man! Do it again! Drink more alcohol!" 

So you can probably imagine I'm having a great time at this point. I had decided to take the Jungle Tour that day so we had to eat lunch, this time Brett had a potato, and then we walked over to the tour place. We got to drive these two person speedboat things all around the Lagoon, following the tour guide. I drove the first half of the trip, then Brett started feeling a little bit better so he wanted to drive. He was doing well, but still had hangover mush brain. He was zig-zagging all over the place and going up on one side, trying to scare me. I told him to stop and he said, "Chayna, it's a boat. You can't mess up a boat!" Less than three minutes later, we were quite a ways behind the instructor so I told him to hurry to try to catch up. Well, the shortest distance between two points is a straight line right? The tour guide had been making big 'S' curves, we darted straight across the lagoon at full speed to catch him... until we hit a sandbar. Yup, we were in 6" deep water, we broke the propeller off the boat and we're stuck. In the middle of the lagoon. Alone. 

I was laughing hysterically, but felt really stupid and was nervous we'd have to pay for the boat. The guy tried to fix if for 20 minutes and finally we're like, "Dude, there is no propeller. Can we just go back?" He was so nice about it, he told me "Don't tell my boss!" I said, "No, you don't tell your boss! I don't want to pay for this shit!" Agreed.  

Brett & I are such assholes that we had ONE DOLLAR to tip the man. 

But, I kind of think he messed with us a little bit so maybe that's all he deserved. He took us to this remote area of the lagoon, made us all park & tie up our boats (yes I thought we were about to become hostages!) and made us stand on the bow of the boats. He said, "Look down into this big hole in the lagoon. It's fresh water. You can swim in there. I will." We all passed on swimming so he told us to at least put on these goggles and look into the 'Fresh Water.' I am not kidding, I think it was Cancun's sewer system! I promise I saw feces and chunks of toilet paper floating up occasionally. Fresh water my ass! But of course, Brett looked in. And is now wondering why his face is breaking out! Hahahaha!

We went to bed around 8PM that night.